EPISODE: How to Help Your Teen or Young Adult Make Empowered Choices
SHOW: Extraordinary Purpose Podcast
HOSTS: Chris & Erin Verdis
LINK: https://www.myextraordinarypurpose.com
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QUICK SUMMARY (SEO-FRIENDLY)
Parents of teens and young adults will learn practical, compassionate ways to help their kids make small daily decisions that build confidence, motivation, and purpose—without rescuing or controlling. We cover self-discovery, choosing supportive environments (college/career), and a 3-question nightly ritual for better choices.
Keywords: parents of teens, young adults, empowered choices, teen motivation, college decisions, self-discovery, life coaching for teens and young adults, supportive parenting.
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CHAPTER GUIDE (EST.)
[00:00] Welcome + Why this matters for parents of teens and young adults
[03:10] The fear behind rescuing—and why it can block resilience
[07:45] Letting go of control so your child can grow
[12:20] The 3 nightly questions that build the “choice-making” muscle
[20:30] Curiosity over clarity: how to help with big decisions (college, career)
[29:00] Example: choosing an environment that fits your teen’s strengths
[38:15] Coaching vs. controlling—how to quietly guide your child
[45:20] Real wins from coaching: when the lightbulb goes on
[53:10] Be a safe place: listen more, advise less
[58:00] How to work with us + next steps
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TRANSCRIPT (CLEAN, READER-FRIENDLY)
[Chris] Hey there, and welcome back to the Extraordinary Purpose Podcast. I’m Chris, and as always, I’m here with the absolutely incredible Erin Verdis. How’s it going, Erin?
[Erin] Hi everyone! It’s going really well. We’re excited to be here and dive into another powerful conversation.
[Chris] If you’re a parent of a teen or a young adult (or any age child), let’s take a breath and slow down. It’s early November—the start of the holiday season for many—and a perfect time to reset and focus on what really helps our kids make empowered choices.
[Erin] Speaking of the season, I heard Christmas music at Target this morning…
[Chris] Too soon! (Kidding… mostly.) But that ties into today’s topic: how to help our teens and young adults make empowered choices—both the small everyday ones and the big life decisions.
[Erin] We see this all the time, and I do it too: we hover, we rescue, we want to make choices for our kids. Underneath that is fear. We’re afraid they’ll choose “wrong,” or choose nothing, or that time/money will be “wasted.” But if we step back, most of us like who we’ve become in our 30s, 40s, and 50s because we fell down, got back up, and learned. When we rescue, we rob our kids of resilience and confidence.
[Chris] Exactly. None of us are perfect, and our kids don’t need us to be. Letting go of control—of the need to have it all figured out—creates space for growth. We see our kids’ potential; we want the best for them. That’s a good impulse. But growth often comes through trying, missing, learning, and trying again.
[Erin] So is there a middle ground between rescuing and throwing them to the wolves? Yes. That’s what we’re sharing today—how to coach your child without controlling them.
[Chris] Recently, a young adult I coach felt overwhelmed by big decisions—where to go to school, what to study, whether to move. We calmed things down first (because anxiety clouds choices) and built a simple nightly practice to strengthen his “choice-making” muscle.
THE 3 NIGHTLY QUESTIONS (FOR TEENS & YOUNG ADULTS)
1) What’s one thing I’ll do differently tomorrow to make it a good day?
— We break autopilot. Small change = forward motion.
2) What’s one thing I’ll do tomorrow to get out of my comfort zone?
— Daily, bite-sized courage builds real confidence.
3) What’s one idea or curiosity I’ll follow up on tomorrow (for ~10 minutes)?
— We turn scattered ideas into micro action and momentum.
[Chris] If your child is stuck on the big choices, start with small daily ones. Consistency builds clarity and self-belief.
[Erin] Parents, you can do this with them: write the questions down, put them on a nightstand or mirror, and check in gently. This warms them up to possibility—without pressure.
[Erin] Now, for bigger choices like college and career, think “curiosity over clarity.” My son River is a senior exploring options. His GPA is middle of the road—lots of schools are possible. We’re starting with self-discovery:
- What are your values?
- What are you passionate or curious about?
- What environments help you thrive? Which ones are distracting?
We toured Wayne State University in Detroit—smaller, more focused vibe compared to big, social campuses like Michigan State or Western Michigan. River is super social and easily distracted, so he’s reflecting on which environment truly supports his success. I didn’t tell him my answer; I asked him to be honest with himself.
[Erin] He thinks about sports management because he played basketball, but we’re widening the lens—Detroit’s pro teams are nearby, yes, and he’s also creative and into music/fashion. Curiosity first. Less tunnel vision. More exploring.
[Chris] You don’t have to have it all figured out. None of us do. What helps is knowing who you are: values, passions, curiosities, strengths and challenges. When kids answer the nightly questions from that foundation, their “small steps” line up with who they’re becoming.
[Chris] In our coaching, we see this shift fast. Even resistant kids light up once they see themselves more clearly. The big, “impossible” stuff starts to feel doable.
[Erin] And parents, be the safe place. Listen more, advise less. Ask questions that deepen your child’s thinking. I’m not perfect at this—last night my daughter had a tough friend situation, I gave an opinion too fast, and she shut down. It happens. We learn and try again.
[Chris] If you want support, we’re here—for parents, teens, and young adults. Sometimes the next right choice is simply talking it through with someone who will listen and guide.
[Erin] We’ll link everything in the show notes. You can always schedule a discovery call with us.
[Both] Thanks for listening. We appreciate you and we’re cheering for your family.
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PULL-QUOTES (SHARABLE)
• “Curiosity over clarity: small choices today build confidence for big decisions tomorrow.”
• “Rescuing can accidentally rob kids of resilience. Listening helps them find it.”
• “Environment matters—choose spaces that support your teen’s strengths.”
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TRY THIS TONIGHT (ONE-MINUTE ROUTINE)
Print or write the 3 Nightly Questions. Put them by your teen’s bed. Ask them to circle one answer they’ll act on tomorrow. Celebrate follow-through.
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RESOURCES & NEXT STEPS
• Coaching for teens, young adults, and parents: https://www.myextraordinarypurpose.com
• Book a discovery call (linked on our website)
• Share this episode with a parent friend who needs encouragement
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