If you’re a mom reading this, there’s a good chance you’ve had this quiet, painful thought cross your mind:

“Why can’t I help my daughter anymore?” or "I'm so worried about my daughter and not sure how else to help her".

Maybe you used to be the person she talked to about everything. Maybe you still are — but lately, it feels like nothing you say actually lands. She feels stuck. Her confidence is low. She’s overwhelmed, anxious, or unsure of herself. And no matter how much you love her, support her, or try to guide her… it just isn’t working the way it used to.

I want to say this clearly, right from the start:

“You haven’t failed. You’re doing a fantastic job.”

Those words matter — because so many moms I talk to every single week feel guilt, shame, or fear that they somehow did something wrong.

You didn’t.

What your daughter is experiencing is not a parenting failure. It’s a developmental passage.

Why Girls Are Wired to Separate From Their Mothers

One of the most important things moms need to understand — and something we don’t talk about nearly enough — is this:

“Girls and young women are wired to need separation from their moms.”

This separation isn’t rejection. It’s not ingratitude. And it’s not a sign that your relationship is broken.

It’s how young women begin to form their own identity.

In adolescence and young adulthood, girls naturally start to look outside their family system for perspective, validation, and guidance. They need space to explore who they are separate from who they’ve always been at home. They need freedom to try on new thoughts, interests, beliefs, and even versions of themselves — without worrying about disappointing the people they love most.

This is where so many moms feel helpless. You can see her potential. You can feel that she’s capable of more. But she just doesn’t want to hear it from you.

And that’s not because you’re doing something wrong.

It’s because you’re her mom.

Why Outside Mentorship Feels Safer Than Talking to Mom

When young women step outside their family system, something powerful happens.

They show up differently.

“When I start working with these young women, it’s an opportunity for them to come to our coaching sessions as a different version of themselves.”

With an outside mentor, there’s no emotional history to navigate. No roles to perform. No expectations to manage. Your daughter doesn’t have to protect you, impress you, or push back against you.

She simply gets to be.

That space — neutral, safe, and supportive — allows her to open up, reflect honestly, and explore what she actually wants. Often for the first time.

And while that can tug at a mom’s heart, it’s also one of the healthiest things that can happen during this stage of development.

Erin’s Story: Why Female Mentorship Changed the Trajectory of My Life

My passion for working with young women isn’t theoretical — it’s deeply personal.

I began my career as a model at 14 and moved to New York City right after high school. From the outside, I looked confident and capable. And in many ways, I was.

But like so many young women, once I left the safety of home, I went through seasons of loneliness, insecurity, and losing my footing. I questioned myself. I got caught up in environments and habits that didn’t serve me. I had what I now call dark nights of the soul.

What changed everything wasn’t my family — even though I come from a family full of loving women.

What changed my life were mentors.

Women who saw something in me I couldn’t yet see in myself.

Teachers. Guides. Spiritual leaders. Artists. Writers. Women who lived embodied, grounded lives — and showed me what was possible.

“I realized I was given this gift of extreme growth in a short amount of time so that I could take all of that and share it with other women.”

That realization is what put me on the path I’m still on today.

Your Daughter Doesn’t Need Fixing — She Needs Space to Discover Herself

One of the hardest truths for moms to accept is this:

Your daughter’s growth doesn’t come from more advice.

It comes from self-discovery.

“Girls need that separation from their moms so that they can start to explore their own identity — their passions, their values, their strengths, and who they are.”

When young women work with a mentor outside the family, they get permission to explore without pressure. They get to speak honestly about fears, dreams, doubts, and desires they might not feel comfortable sharing at home.

This isn’t about replacing you.

It’s about supporting her.

Why Extraordinary Purpose Uses a His-and-Her Coaching Model

At Extraordinary Purpose, this belief is foundational to everything we do.

Young women thrive when they are guided by empowered, grounded women.

Young men thrive when they are guided by strong, present men.

That’s why Erin works with moms and young women, and Chris works with dads and young men.

It’s not about separation — it’s about resonance.

When young people feel understood at a nervous-system level, growth accelerates. Confidence builds faster. Resistance softens. Trust deepens.

And parents feel supported — not sidelined.

“We’re with you. We’re parents too.”

Work With Erin: Support for Moms & Young Women

If you’re a mom who feels worried, frustrated, or scared for your daughter…

If you feel like there’s only so much you can do — and you’re carrying that weight alone…

I want you to know you don’t have to.

I work with young women who feel stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected from themselves — and with moms who want to support their daughters without damaging the relationship.

My role isn’t to replace you.

It’s to walk alongside your daughter as a trusted female guide — helping her reconnect with her confidence, clarify her values, and discover who she is becoming.

“If you’re feeling helpless, frustrated, or scared… I just want you to know it’s okay. Have grace with yourself.”

If you’d like to have a conversation about your daughter — no pressure, no obligation — I’m here.

Moms need support too.

And sometimes, the most loving thing you can do is invite another empowered woman into your daughter’s life.

Erin Verdis is a life coach for young women and co-founder of Extraordinary Purpose. She specializes in helping teen girls and young adult women build confidence, clarity, and direction — while supporting moms through one of the most emotionally complex seasons of parenting.